It’s so funny because I always make jokes that I grew up in a bubble. For example it wasn’t until I started working at the studio that I found out what a vegan was. I had no idea what planet organic was until I went with Melissa to get some soup there one day. I also didn’t know what chakras were until I started the yoga. I guess growing up in the country makes you a little naïve sometimes, hence the bubble. I am definitely not going to complain because I love being a country girl and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Not even an hour drive into work stops me from leaving my little bubble. I bring this up because it is so funny how things like that are a mirror image when we are brought into an environment like teacher training. I have heard and expected that after living with the same 300 people for two months that there would be drama. The funny thing is that I have stayed in my own little world, not gotten involved, and never realized how much drama there is here until last night at the bbq. It was so funny to stand there and just listen to it all. I thought I would take a couple minutes to reflect on that because I found it quite amusing.
Last week when Michael was lecturing us, he told us his story and what brought him to and kept him doing Bikram yoga. I will maybe save that story for another day. After he had us riled up about his story he brought another teacher up on the stage as earlier that day she has opened up to him and told him her story.
She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer years back, before she discovered Bikram yoga. I don’t remember who exactly got her started on the yoga but none the less she tried it. She was in and out of doing it for awhile, not sure what to make of it. She eventually had to get her ovaries removed and after that she made the decision to commit to the yoga. Six months before she was supposed to go to teacher training her doctor called her. He told her to come in because they found something on the last test they did. She had been cancer free for some time now but still getting regular check ups. Before she went into the doctor’s office she made a testament to the universe asking God to give her the strength to deal with anything that was thrown at her that day. In the doctors office she was shown an x-ray of her insides and he pointed to a spot above her uterus. The doctor said to her, “I don’t know how this happened but one of your ovaries has started to grow back”. She sat on the stage telling us her story with tears streaming down her face, probably similar to the way she cried in the doctor’s office that day. You NEVER know someone’s story.
I feel blessed that I am in a position where I am able to hear these stories. I feel sorry for the people here that don’t understand English and totally miss out on the amazing stuff we get to hear. That teacher ended with the best line I heard all week, "I don’t know if it was the yoga, but there is no reason for me NOT to believe in it with my entire soul".
Last night when I was sleeping I got woken up with a cramp in my left calf. At first it felt more uncomfortable than a painful hurting feeling. I was too tired to deal with it so I gave my leg a shake and went back to sleep. I don’t know how much later but I woke up again with the same cramp and my entire lower leg was throbbing. I actually started to laugh because I have not had a cramp since forever ago, I don’t think it helped that I was half asleep. I flexed my foot a couple times, stretched it out and went back to sleep. This morning I woke up and my calf muscle was sore. I told Eleni about it and I was actually laughing about the way it happened. I think it’s entertaining that I was so out of it, that a leg cramp that gave me a sore muscle the next day barely woke me up. Okay it’s not that funny but little things like that amuse me these days.
That night when Michael lectured he talked about issues in our tissues. I am a true believer of this and am starting to really understand how it is all related. This past week I am just starting to personally feel some past issues come up in my body. I have said a couple times how good my body has been to me and how lucky I am. Besides my hip ailment that I had to work through a couple weeks ago, I haven’t had to push through too much pain or stiffness. At the end of this week I started to feel pain in my left knee. At first I thought maybe it was from the way I twist my body around when I come out of savasana. I have become a little more aware of that movement and it did help. By Saturday morning though, it was tough to lock my knee for the full sets of anything. I knew standing there and doing nothing wouldn’t help it so I continued to work through it posture by posture.
Later that day I was thinking about my knee a little bit, trying to figure out what was up with it. Earlier this year, I think in Feburary I twisted my knee in a soccer game. That night I couldn’t put pressure on it because it hurt so bad. The next day I couldn’t even bend or fully straighten my knee but I had to work so I grabbed an ice pack and iced it on the drive in. I decided that the best thing to do was to get in that hot room, so I went in at noon. I couldn’t lock my knee for the warm up or for the first posture. The second posture is one where you have to bend your knees and sit in an imaginary chair. I was able to do the first two parts of the posture. On the third part when you have to go all the way down, ha, I couldn’t even bring my knees together to touch. By the time we came to the balancing series (half hour in), I was able to completely straighten my leg and lock my knee. It hurt and I was in and out of the posture because of the pain but it was all good. After the class I couldn’t even tell my knee was hurt a couple hours ago. I felt a little twinge of pain for the next week but nothing compared to the morning after I hurt it. I even ended up playing soccer that weekend.After remembering about that injury I was able to relate the two pains. The pain at the time of the injury was exactly the same as I am feeling right now.
I talked to a couple people that have said in the last two weeks they are starting to feel old injuries resurface too. I am glad that my body is able to bring this up and deal with it in a non painful manner so far. At the same time I am kind up upset that is has taken me this long to bring up something from only six months ago. Patience is a virtue.
I was talking with Damian about ailments that come up and how different people deal with them. We have seen many examples of people who have a lot of anger and rage inside. They don’t have any clue how to be with themselves let alone deal with what is going on inside them. Any emotions that come up turns into what I call drama in the yoga room; moving, drinking, wiping, closing the eyes, and running out of the room. One of my biggest challenges here is to not let those people affect me and what I am doing. It is so easy to get caught up in the drama people create for themselves so we don’t have to focus on ourself, it is hard to look at yourself in that mirror some days. That’s why there are days when I say my yoga for the day is trying not to focus on and get caught up in that energy/drama. Don’t get me wrong, the first week here I was all caught up in the drama and anxiety of the room. I was lucky enough to realize it, reflect and come back to myself.
I told Damian the reason I don’t have anything come up is because I dealt with it when I was little; that’s what brothers are for, haha. I make a joke out of it but I think that having a sibling close to your age makes a huge difference. I really think it helped me learn to deal with and channel my emotions, sometimes not in the most civilized manner. At the time there might have been better ways to deal with it but looking back now I think its better then holding it all in. Who would have thought that all that yelling, screaming, pushing and crying would flourish into one of my most secure relationships as an adult.
I spent much of this blog reflecting, it seems to be my Sunday routine these past few weeks. I end up doing this on Sundays because it is our day off from everything yoga, well except for studying dialogue. I think this weekend should the last one for worrying about memorizing dialogue.
Last week when Michael was lecturing us, he told us his story and what brought him to and kept him doing Bikram yoga. I will maybe save that story for another day. After he had us riled up about his story he brought another teacher up on the stage as earlier that day she has opened up to him and told him her story.
She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer years back, before she discovered Bikram yoga. I don’t remember who exactly got her started on the yoga but none the less she tried it. She was in and out of doing it for awhile, not sure what to make of it. She eventually had to get her ovaries removed and after that she made the decision to commit to the yoga. Six months before she was supposed to go to teacher training her doctor called her. He told her to come in because they found something on the last test they did. She had been cancer free for some time now but still getting regular check ups. Before she went into the doctor’s office she made a testament to the universe asking God to give her the strength to deal with anything that was thrown at her that day. In the doctors office she was shown an x-ray of her insides and he pointed to a spot above her uterus. The doctor said to her, “I don’t know how this happened but one of your ovaries has started to grow back”. She sat on the stage telling us her story with tears streaming down her face, probably similar to the way she cried in the doctor’s office that day. You NEVER know someone’s story.
I feel blessed that I am in a position where I am able to hear these stories. I feel sorry for the people here that don’t understand English and totally miss out on the amazing stuff we get to hear. That teacher ended with the best line I heard all week, "I don’t know if it was the yoga, but there is no reason for me NOT to believe in it with my entire soul".
Last night when I was sleeping I got woken up with a cramp in my left calf. At first it felt more uncomfortable than a painful hurting feeling. I was too tired to deal with it so I gave my leg a shake and went back to sleep. I don’t know how much later but I woke up again with the same cramp and my entire lower leg was throbbing. I actually started to laugh because I have not had a cramp since forever ago, I don’t think it helped that I was half asleep. I flexed my foot a couple times, stretched it out and went back to sleep. This morning I woke up and my calf muscle was sore. I told Eleni about it and I was actually laughing about the way it happened. I think it’s entertaining that I was so out of it, that a leg cramp that gave me a sore muscle the next day barely woke me up. Okay it’s not that funny but little things like that amuse me these days.
That night when Michael lectured he talked about issues in our tissues. I am a true believer of this and am starting to really understand how it is all related. This past week I am just starting to personally feel some past issues come up in my body. I have said a couple times how good my body has been to me and how lucky I am. Besides my hip ailment that I had to work through a couple weeks ago, I haven’t had to push through too much pain or stiffness. At the end of this week I started to feel pain in my left knee. At first I thought maybe it was from the way I twist my body around when I come out of savasana. I have become a little more aware of that movement and it did help. By Saturday morning though, it was tough to lock my knee for the full sets of anything. I knew standing there and doing nothing wouldn’t help it so I continued to work through it posture by posture.
Later that day I was thinking about my knee a little bit, trying to figure out what was up with it. Earlier this year, I think in Feburary I twisted my knee in a soccer game. That night I couldn’t put pressure on it because it hurt so bad. The next day I couldn’t even bend or fully straighten my knee but I had to work so I grabbed an ice pack and iced it on the drive in. I decided that the best thing to do was to get in that hot room, so I went in at noon. I couldn’t lock my knee for the warm up or for the first posture. The second posture is one where you have to bend your knees and sit in an imaginary chair. I was able to do the first two parts of the posture. On the third part when you have to go all the way down, ha, I couldn’t even bring my knees together to touch. By the time we came to the balancing series (half hour in), I was able to completely straighten my leg and lock my knee. It hurt and I was in and out of the posture because of the pain but it was all good. After the class I couldn’t even tell my knee was hurt a couple hours ago. I felt a little twinge of pain for the next week but nothing compared to the morning after I hurt it. I even ended up playing soccer that weekend.After remembering about that injury I was able to relate the two pains. The pain at the time of the injury was exactly the same as I am feeling right now.
I talked to a couple people that have said in the last two weeks they are starting to feel old injuries resurface too. I am glad that my body is able to bring this up and deal with it in a non painful manner so far. At the same time I am kind up upset that is has taken me this long to bring up something from only six months ago. Patience is a virtue.
I was talking with Damian about ailments that come up and how different people deal with them. We have seen many examples of people who have a lot of anger and rage inside. They don’t have any clue how to be with themselves let alone deal with what is going on inside them. Any emotions that come up turns into what I call drama in the yoga room; moving, drinking, wiping, closing the eyes, and running out of the room. One of my biggest challenges here is to not let those people affect me and what I am doing. It is so easy to get caught up in the drama people create for themselves so we don’t have to focus on ourself, it is hard to look at yourself in that mirror some days. That’s why there are days when I say my yoga for the day is trying not to focus on and get caught up in that energy/drama. Don’t get me wrong, the first week here I was all caught up in the drama and anxiety of the room. I was lucky enough to realize it, reflect and come back to myself.
I told Damian the reason I don’t have anything come up is because I dealt with it when I was little; that’s what brothers are for, haha. I make a joke out of it but I think that having a sibling close to your age makes a huge difference. I really think it helped me learn to deal with and channel my emotions, sometimes not in the most civilized manner. At the time there might have been better ways to deal with it but looking back now I think its better then holding it all in. Who would have thought that all that yelling, screaming, pushing and crying would flourish into one of my most secure relationships as an adult.
I spent much of this blog reflecting, it seems to be my Sunday routine these past few weeks. I end up doing this on Sundays because it is our day off from everything yoga, well except for studying dialogue. I think this weekend should the last one for worrying about memorizing dialogue.
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